A festival of clouts!

On Saturday, the Bostons returned to the ball-park in Anaheim invigorated after their loss Friday evening. The walloping by the "Angels" must have sparked many a locker-room diatribe by the team's veteran members, for the Red Stockings responded famously.

It was, as the Germans say, a cloutfest.

Huzzah to Jason "Argonaut" Bay and Mikey "Two Bags" Lowell, who swatted furious full circuit clouts to bring the Bostons ahead of their West-Coast Foes. And to cap the back-and-forth tilt, old "Dancin' Jonny" Papelbon engaged in ninth-chapter battle with several of the Anaheimians before securing the Victory with a routine fly-ball to the right outfielder, the Pride of Little Rhode Island, Rocco Baldelli.

Five games down, 157 to come.

The return of "Two Bags" Lowell!

Our intrepid third bagger, Mikey "Two Bags" Lowell, returned to the pitch for the first time in game duty this young season after suffering with a bum hip for much of the Red Stocking's last campaign.

What a relief to see him stretching his once-balky joints along the playing field! What a delight to see his Florida-bred swing slice through the rarefied citrus-scented air of the Peninsula State!

And to heap even more pleasure on the proceedings, Two Bags struck well in his batting stance, heaving the horsehide over the 'tween-bagger's head and into the out-field grass. Huzzah, Two Bags!

His nimble feet were not to be tested to-day as Skipper T. Francona substituted a yannigan base-runner as his replacement. However, I hope to witness old Two Bags reach the bases and even burgle a sack to put his repaired hip through its paces. Then I will certainly be assured that the redoubtable Two Bags will assume his proper placement at the "hot" corner.

Spring continues, and hope springs eternal, dear Rooters!

Two mighty shots, and down go the Kansans!

There’s no more devastating blow in all of sport than a full circuit clout delivered with a full complement of base-runners on the bags. One such wallop is a rare and delightful enough sight. Two in the same contest? That is an embarrassment of riches, and a sure road to ruin for the hapless squad that receives such a battering.

And so, down went the Kansas City nine to the Bostons’ heavy batting. Ol’ Aches and Pains Drew and Mike “Two-Bags” Lowell made the most of their turns at the plate, when the diamond was studded with red-stocking’d gents. Not even our volatile, hydrogen-fueled relief corps could surrender the lead achieved on the occasion of those two mighty swats.

Onward to California, where our boys must again battle the discomforts of the cramped Pullman car, unfamiliar grounds, and the questionable availability of Duffy’s Pure Malt Whiskey. Let’s hope the heavy batting continues tonight, to support the always erratic twirling of Knuckles Wakefield.