The right foot forward!

Quite literally, our Heroic Capt. Varitek is putting his right foot forward, and doing it better than he previously has, according to witnesses. Our stout-limbed leader has followed the sage advice of swatting advisor David Madigan, Esq., and altered his batter's stance from the left side -- a side that proved meddlesome during the last full season of base-ball.

It's no question that proper anatomical mechanics are key for swatters and hurlers alike, and I, for one, am pleased our fearless captain has had the fortitude to recognize the changes that must be made and the courage to implement such changes.

I look forward to a swatting season when our heroic backstop arrives safely at the first sack more often than twice and two-tenths for every 10 batting appearances. (Mathematics watchers will enjoy this phrased as a decimal -- a .220 "batting average". As Stuffy and I become more comfortable with this nomenclature, we at Full Circuit Clout will begin adopting such phraseology.)