Sometimes, there are just no words

Ponder your failure, relief-hurlers. Your epic, world-beating failure.

Ponder, and remember.

Never again.

(Back to my day-bed with a tumbler of Duffy's)

Return of the Native

A low, hungry feeling came over me this morning as I considered the plain truth of the previous evening. Another fine hurling performance by “Knuckles” Wakefield answered by his club-mates with listless swatting. Another late-chapter failure by the bull pen. Another defeat for the Bostons in a faraway ball-park.

But the time for gloomily chewing on our moustaches is over, as the Nine are set to begin another contest on the unfriendly Pacific coast. and to-night, we have a special card up our sleeve: Our starting Hurler is no stranger to the environs of Seattle.

He is a lad from the land of loggers, raised among the mists of Puget Sound and the timber-scented currents that blow down from the Cascades. Mounting the mound this evening should feel to “Nothin’ Doin’” Lester as much like a “home” match as any at Fenway Park, and his twirling should perform accordingly. Lead on, Lester, to a sorely needed road triumph.

June Gloom

The glorious summer sun resolved today to no longer hide its warming glow under a bushel, yet this rooter can’t shake the damp gloom that so recently gripped his corner of the Red Stocking’d Nation.

The annual barnstorming tour of National League competitors is historically an occasion for our team to exert its might over lesser squads, tallying “wins” that propel them to the October tournament of champions. This year, however, there’s been a decided absence of vim from the local nine when presented the chance to make hay.

Falling twice to the Scarlet Birds of St. Louis -- in matches contested at Friendly Fenway no less! Allowing a taut twirling duel to slip into the “loss” column after repeatedly positioning men at the second and third bags and failing to deliver a conclusive swat! This is not the play of defending World Champions.

Even glimpses of hope are quickly darkened with shadow: “Yukon” Youkilis connects for a dramatic, victory-sealing four-ply drive one day; the next, he’s off the field and on the physician’s table after an errant toss of the pill connects with his orbital socket!

If the squad can not shape up tonight and demonstrate why they’ve achieved the apex of the base-ball world, Yukon won’t be the only team-member sporting a purple “shiner.”